When a Mommy and Daddy Penguin Love Each Other Very Much...

This modern story of turmoil and triumph begins as most generally do... with a drunk-ass penguin. In order to protect his identity, we will refer to him only as Edward Matthews III. Ed was living the life of a bachelor penguin, jet setting around the arctic on his Harley big-wheel by day, and partying on the finest fish at night. Always the life of the party, he always had blond, brunet, and red bow-tied young penguettes on his flipper, yet nothing in his life felt of great importance. That all changed the day he met the love of his life; Quackers, the big-flippered penguinette that would finally tame Ed, make him settle down and make and egg. And Ed was happy... for a while. But predictably he soon became restless, and returned to his free-wheeling ways. Destroyed, Quackers fled with their egg in the middle of the arctic night, not wanting her young one to have such an immoral father figure. The chastened Ed sobered up to the reality that his egg was gone, and then immediately got sloshed and set off to find his egg...